Day 20 of 365 Tiny Changes
They’re finished. All the medical tests I needed to rush to have done, are completed. (See Day 13 for details.)
I’ve been poked, and prodded, and scoped, in areas I never even knew I had. If I had been abducted by aliens, and put through some of these same procedures, I would be suffering from Posttraumatic Stress Disorder, and be making millions by doing the talk show circuit.
I guess, since I willingly paid my insurance premiums on a monthly basis, and I set the appointments myself, and then gave more money when asked, I don’t get to call PTSD, or do the talk show circuit. I literally asked to be a medical play toy. Silly me.
I really should be happy that I have access to such medical treatments, with such good insurance. It was just a little difficult to think that way when I was going through the process. Especially the colonoscopy.
I tried to treat it just like any other medical test, until I drank the prep drink. This stuff is designed to completely empty my body of everything, and I mean everything. I don’t want to go into the gory details. I’ll just suffice it to say, I could have read the entire 5000+ pages of Crime and Punishment while sitting on the toilet that evening. I could have read it twice, accept that I fell asleep...yes, on the pot.
The next morning I had the presence of mind to weigh myself, before I got dressed. How many other times in my life am I going to have the opportunity to get my true body weight, sans food in my body? Hopefully, this is the one and only. Guess what, I’m not that much lighter with no food in my body. Disappointing, to say the least. No more blaming the pizza I had for dinner for the “temporary” increase in my poundage.
My appointment was at 6:30 AM. Which was great for me. I have a very active imagination, especially when it comes to medical testing. That early, my mind isn’t engaged yet, and they had some really good drugs to keep my mind off of the Roto-Rooter type snake they were about to shove up my a....
I got home at about 10:00 AM and slept until 2:30 PM. Guy tells me I had some interesting things to say to him on our drive home. I have no memory of what I said, or even the ride home. Ya gotta love good medically prescribed drugs.
The results are still coming in, but so far all tests are confirming that I’m a perfectly healthy 50 year old woman. Maybe that should be womEn.
All that poking and prodding and not one medical professional said one word about the fact that I am almost double the weight I was in high school. I can almost make 2 of who I was then. (Well, really 1 3/4, but just what does a 3/4 person look like?) I’ll put it this way, if I were eaten by cannibals, the entire tribe would suffer from high cholesterol, afterwards, and be put on a fat free diet.
I can try to fool myself into thinking I was overly slender way back then, even down right skinny, and I’m just evening it out now, but that’s not true. I was at the bottom of the acceptable weight limits for my height, back then.
Is being over weight in the Midwest just accepted, even expected? Or do I really look like a bruiser that could knock the Doctor out flat if they told me something I didn’t want to hear?
There have been studies that have proven that the people that live to be 100 years old or older have Doctors who treat them aggressively. I’m not saying the Doctors are mean or rude. I’m saying that they are quick to address and treat problems. How am I going to make it to 102 if my Doctor doesn’t even notice I’m fat at 50? What good are all these medical tests if I have to look in the mirror and diagnose myself?
Time to find a very young, highly proactive doctor, willing to stick it out with me till the end. In the mean time, it appears I’m going to have to self prescribe my own treatments.
Tiny Change 20: Ten minutes of walking, every day.
Doctors beware, the end of the baby boomers are coming of age. We are self aware and highly demanding. If you aren’t proactive in your treatment of our ailments, we will find someone who is. We may be getting older, but we still want it all, and will for a very long time into the future!